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I'm sharing this journal entry from one of our sheep / shepherds for your encouragement and invite you to share your stories to keep us connected David
Thursday April 2, 2020: A journal entry:
JESUS WEPT.
A Morning mist of low cloud wrapped soft around the hills.
I read John 6 and tried to ponder on Jesus the living bread. But the mist beckoned and drew me outside, quickly enfolding me in its clammy embrace.
There was no pausing to choose direction. I headed straight up the hill blanketed in the foggy stillness, only birdcall echoing the inner certainty – she’s coming to pray.
Pray up the hill. I haven’t prayed up there for a while. I’ve prayed. But not there on God’s hill, my place of retreat.
At the summit, as cloud drifted and lifted, it was my heart that rained out its anguished plea, the cry for help with COVID19: LORD HEAR OUR PRAYER. Help us Jesus.
That was it. No wordy waffle. I perched on the rim of the damp bench, poised in grief and need; heart, mind and spirit turned to God, “Yet still do I praise you Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Living God.”
A lull then settled over me, like a mute button had been pressed to hush the turmoil of my distressed thoughts and wretched emotions concerning the plight of the world’s people. Wait. Be quiet!
Jesus wept. The words from last Sunday’s reading came to mind loud and clear.
33 When Jesus saw her crying, and the Judaeans who had come with her crying, he was deeply stirred in his spirit, and very troubled. 34 ‘Where have you laid him?’ he asked. ‘Master,’ they said, ‘come and see.’ 35 Jesus burst into tears. (John 11:33-35 NTE)
I too burst into tears, and as I wept, there at the top of the hill, I knew he was weeping with me. Weeping with all the world. Weeping for us all.
Turn to me. And I, turning, vision all awash, could see clearly, he was there. Feed my sheep. To this I shook my head, and thought, I’m no pastor. You are a minister of my word. Therefore, speak my word to others. Speak my word to one another. And suddenly understanding dawned. “You aren’t just saying this to me, are you? It’s your call to all of us: Feed your sheep. The responsibility is ours collectively.” And I pictured the scattered sheep, isolated from one another but belonging together and needing creative new ways of being church and speaking grace and hope to one another and others.
I plunged, then, down the hill, not following the worn paths but winding down the steeper slope, weaving through knee high weeds, around rocky mounds and patches of slippery flattened grass, to emerge at the wider base track.
Now is the time to forge new paths. Jesus is still the Way, the “base track” of my faith remains the same. It’s the network of familiar paths that represent how we have lived out our faith, that have fallen away, not God’s word or his kingdom, or his love.
I am thankful for this love that comes to us where we are: scattered sheep weeping in the mist of uncertainty. I’m thankful that Jesus wept and that his way isn’t set in stone. That he comes and calls us to discover a new and living way, today and tomorrow and the next day. Hallelujah! This is a new day! And the Jesus who weeps with us in our distress will renew us and lead us on beyond COVID19.
JESUS WEPT.
The autumn sun filtered a pale ray through the drifting grey. A reminder that the God who weeps, also sheds light as well as tears.
Absolutely Certain 19th Day in Lent (Wednesday) Read: Romans 8:31-39 “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels not demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39 (NIV)
There is not a lot in this world to which I hold absolute certainty! We lived through COVID 19 and saw how quickly a world can shut down, new laws put in place, not being able to buy toilet paper, and be faced with fear and uncertainty of catching this dreaded virus. Then with the weather, will the forecast be correct or should I doubt BOM (Bureau of Meteorology)? With all the computer scamming happening can I be absolutely certain that my money will still be in the bank when I want to use it? Going for holidays, can I be absolutely certain that my home will not be burgled while I am away?
All these things happening in the world bring fear to our lives and it seems there is nothing certain to hold on to. The Apostle Paul points us to our God: “If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all – how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?” (Romans 8:31b–32 NIV) This is something we can be absolutely certain about. God loves you so much that He sent His Son, Jesus, to suffer and die for all our sins and wrongdoings.
God then raised Him to life, after beating death so that you and I can now no longer be left condemned of all our sin but be made righteous (perfect) in God’s eyes. You can be absolutely certain, that nothing can now separate us from God… read the list above in verses 38 and 39. This is the hope we have, that there is a loving God who wants us to be with Him for all eternity and there is nothing in this world now that can stop this.
God made sure of this 2,000 years ago when He sent His sinless Son to die for our sins. This broke the power that the devil had over us. You are God’s child now and for eternity! You can be absolutely certain of this!
Prayer: Thank you, Jesus, that you made a way for me to be righteous and holy before God. You have made my salvation and all your promises absolutely certain. I don’t need to fear but live in hope. Amen.
Waiting for Christmas 18th Day in Lent (Tuesday) Read: Romans 8:22-25 “For it was by hope that we were saved; but if we see what we hope for, then it is not really hope. For who of us hopes for something we see? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.” Romans 8:24-25 (GNT)
In the beginning of ‘The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe’, by C. S. Lewis, the land of Narnia is described as always winter and never Christmas. Narnia has been in a perpetual winter for as long as any of the Narnians could remember because of the reign of the White Witch. There was no hope or light in this winter to remind the Narnians that winter is only temporary (in the Northern Hemisphere, winter means that Christmas is coming). They could see nothing to be hopeful for, yet they hung onto the prophecy of the downfall of the White Witch and the return of Aslan.
For those who haven’t yet read this book, I hope I have given you the incentive to read it. It may seem like a children’s book, but there is so much gospel in it. There is disobedience and forgiveness, evil and the overcoming goodness, sadness and joy! Aslan is the ‘Jesus figure’ who returns to Narnia bringing hope and Christmas and the ending of despair and winter. The coming of Christmas in Narnia is a reminder that no matter how dark the world gets, darkness cannot overcome the light. Christmas was a few months ago now, but every day we need to be reminded of Christmas and the coming of our Saviour.
That is a reason I keep a few nativity scenes up all year round! Jesus has come to bring light into a dark world. So then at Easter, our Saviour’s purpose comes into focus. He came to bring us hope and the surety of eternal life. Lent is sometimes seen as a sombre, dark time as we follow Jesus to the cross. But Jesus did this all for you and me. He went to the cross willingly to give us hope and a future where before there was no hope.
So now we can wait for our salvation patiently knowing that it is in heaven that our Saviour will welcome us with open arms and it will always be Christmas! Even though we can’t see ‘hope’ – know that Jesus is your hope!
Prayer: My loving Saviour, you bring me hope in a darkened world. Give me patience to wait for this eternal joy in your presence. I can’t see it yet, but I wait expectantly and with hope. Amen
Comparisons 17th Day in Lent (Monday) Read: Romans 8:18-21 “I consider that what we suffer at this present time cannot be compared at all with the glory that is going to be revealed to us.” Romans 8:18 (GNT)
I grew up eating rissoles in hamburgers. Made with minced meat, flour, egg, breadcrumbs, chicken noodle soup mix and spices all these things added made the minced meat go further, especially having four older brothers. My husband, Mark, on the other hand grew up with hamburgers being 100% minced beef – nothing added. Apart from MacDonald’s there are not many places in Australia that serves 100% beef patties. This at times causes Mark consternation. He doesn’t understand why things need to be added to the minced meat. For him there is no comparison in taste.
Me on the other hand, prefer the rissoles for that is what I grew up with; so, we agree to disagree and have to suffer with our differences, depending on who cooks. St Paul tells us throughout Romans and the other letters he has written that we are going to suffer through this life. Hamburger preferences are probably the least of our sufferings. We cannot understand why things happen, ‘Why did God let this happen to me?’
God does not let bad things happen to His children. It is because we sin and we continually do wrong things that evil takes over. God is always there to pick up the pieces and bring comfort, peace and understanding over these situations. God wants us to keep our faith and strengthen our trust in Him. In the above verse, Paul writes that our suffering is nothing compared to our future glory that we all wait in hope for. God gives us in the Bible, little glimpses of what things will be like when we die, but I think it is 100% better than even my greatest hope.
So, we suffer through our hamburger preferences (the little sufferings) and then the bigger times of trials (sickness, loss, family, etc). We know that this suffering will pass and God’s glory will take over, and all creation will experience freedom and be fully restored. Then we will live in an eternal kingdom with no pain or sorrow. Our future hope is 100% better.
Prayer: My loving Father God, I cannot compare what it will be like to live with you in glory. You have planned out my future, and I trust and hope in your promises. Amen.